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Once upon a time, in a zone far, far away... there lived a little boy. Now this boy has been seen running rampant throughout every zone. The little boys name was Terry R. Now little Terry R. was flying his little Terry R. ship in his favorite zone, could be any zone...doesn't matter. Stop interrupting me. Anyway, Terry R. saw a funny little white ship - and to his surprise, there was not a stream of bullets in front of this ship.

"That ship must suck!" cried Terry R., "He has no stream of bullets in front of him, he's asking for it." So, Terry R. aimed his stream of bullets toward the seemingly defenseless white ship, only breaking from his stream of bullets to drop a well timed mid-air burst.

"That'll show that idiot in that funny little ship!" thought Terry R., "he's so stupid, hes flying right through my mid air burst!" Now the crafty little white ship seeing the feisty bursting ship heading towards him stopped in the middle of his flight path only to have Terry R. coming in at him - full speed ahead.

"Die looser!" shouted Terry R. (he can't spell loser correctly) "Eat this!", and Terry R. shot off a bomb despite the fact that he was 1/2 inch away from the funny white ship. Now the white ship is shocked by what he sees, so he hits the ctrl key and spits out 3 little blue bullets, killing Terry R. instantly.

Now Terry R. was quite in shock to say the least. Terry R. released his finger from the ctrl key, jaw gaping. Terry R. wiped away a tear that was forming in his tear duct, and gathered himself enough to type a public message in all capital letters...

"LAGGER!"

"Who? Who?" were the responses seen, "that guy that killed me! I bombed him and bursted him and he is cheating or he would have died!", exclaimed Terry R. "Show him to us" the public chanted, "show us this lagging cheater" and his name was displayed over the public channel. And the public came and watched the accused lagger. The public spectated the accused lagger. The public wanted this accused lagger to be brought to justice, a swift crushing by the hand of Rod or something of that nature... but there was no lagging to be seen. The funny white ship moved gracefully about the screen, with neither pip nor pop visable to all those who looked on.

"That ship is not lagging" the public said to Terry R., "maybe it is you who are the lagger."

But Terry R. refused to budge. "I saw him lag! There is no way he could have lived through my bullets bombs and bursts without lagging! LAGGER!", but the accusations fell upon deaf ears, as the public continued with their conversation on the subject of "who is the toughest Power Ranger".

"Damn newbies" thought Terry R., "go back to alpha." "I'll show them. I'll go to a safe zone with my stream and kill them all." So Terry R. headed toward the safe zone. No less than three of the funny white ships and a funny yellow one sat in the safe zone, much to Terry R.'s delight.

"Idiots." he thought, "don't they realize the power of the double gun ship? This is gonna be sooo cool." So, Terry R. proceded to lay 3 mines just outside of the safe zone. Just as Terry R. was laying a fourth mine on his little pile, (Terry R. does not realize that three will do the trick), a big bright blue bomb smacked him right in the keyster, destroying him instantly. Terry's lip quivered... a trickle of persperation ran down his forehead, dropping onto his keyboard. Terry R.'s fingers trembled like Katherine Hepburn sitting on a clothes dryer. Terry R. mustered up all of his sanity that was left.

"LAGGER!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

The cry was heard by all on the public frequency, "LAGGER LAGGER LAGGER!!!!!!! LAGGER I SAY, LAGGER!!!!!!"

"Who? Who?", was the reply from the public.

"A big blue bomb guy! He lagged onto my screen, cheated and killed me!"

"What was his name?" stated the public, hungry to form a lynch mob...

"I don't know! But he is laaaaaaagging!!!! BAN HIM!!!"

"You must tell us who he is, or we can not gang up on him Terry", exclaimed the public.

"I COULDN'T SEE HIS NAME! HE WAS LAGGING SO BAD, HIS NAME WAS THREE SCREENS BACK!!!!" ...but there were no more replies to Terry R.'s cries of woe.

"BAN THE LAGGER!" typed Terry R. once more, but the public was too busy discussing the greatness of sugar cereals to further aknowledge Terry's cries.

"Pussys." thought Terry R. "They are too scared that the lagger will kill them too." vTerry R. again applied full pressure on the ctrl key, and continued on his journey, still fuming from his last encounter. "I'll kill all these damn laggers" thought Terry R., "I'll kill all of them and show them a little thing or two about ELITE piloting. Durn cheaters."

Now right about this time, along comes Johnny Ploss. Now Johnny Ploss isn't your normal type of ship, as Terry R. soon realized. Terry R. looked at his radar only to see a bright blue dot blinking on and off, only to appear on a completely different spot seconds later. Terry bit down hard on his lower lip. "L-l-l-ag", but Terry R. could not get the word out. "L-A-G-G- L-A-G-" but Terry was still too worked up to muster the transfer between thought and typing skills. Suddenly, Johnny Ploss popped onto Terry R.'s screen, right in front of Terry R.'s stream of bullets.

"I got you now lagger!" thought Terry R. "I'm gonna kill a real lagger!", but it was not to be. Johnny Ploss sat directly in front of Terry R.'s ship, taking massive amounts of double barrel gun fire right in his hull.

"DIE LAGGER!!!!!!!" "DIE DIE DIE!!!!!!!!!". But Johnny Ploss would not die. Johnny Ploss instead slowly turned his ship to face Terry R.'s and fired one yellow bomb right at Terry's ship. And Terry R.'s ship exploded. And Johnny Ploss dissapeared, only to appear 4 screens away within the next two seconds.

Terry R. stood quickly out of his chair, knocking it to the floor. Terry R. grabbed clumps of his hair with each fist and pulled. Terry R. kicked his computer desk, only to have the cupboard door swing open and spill out his collection of Boys Life magazines. Terry R. was pissed.

"LAGGER!" "LAGGER LAGGER LAGGER!!!!!!!!!" "THIS TIME IT'S FOR REAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!" "I SAW A LAGGER!!!!!!!!!!!!" "GET THE LAGGER!!!!!!! GET THE LAGGER!!!!!!!!!!!" wrote Terry R., but there was no response...the public went on with their conversation about who had sex with who's mother...and Terry R.'s cries were ignored.

"GODDAMMIT I SAW A LAGGER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" "COME ON GUYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" "THERE'S A LAGGER AMONGST US!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" "BAN HIM!!!! KILL HIM!!!!!" "LLAAAAAAGGGER!!!!!" "LAGGER!" "LAgger" "lagger". But Terry R. was ignored. No one believed Terry R.'s cries of lagger anymore.

"Why wont they listen?" sniveled Terry R., "Why don't they believe me?"... and with that, Terry R. cupped his hands over his eyes and wept. Terry R. wept so hard that his retainer fell out of his mouth onto the floor and the dog ran off with it.

"Why????? Whu-hu-hu-hu-hu-hu-hyyyyyyyy!!!" cried Terry R. "They don't believe me-e-e-e. Hff hff hff sniff hfff...they are probably all la-ha-ha-aggers too!" and with that, Terry R. uncupped his hands from his eyes, just in time to see a spider uncloak next to him and destroy his idle ship.

And Terry R. was never heard from again.

Although two days later, this message was spotted on the public chat channel: "--////TeRRy R (ELITE)\\\--: LAGGER!!!"

-The Famous One